


The Night He Left

by hecalledherlittlewolf



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M, Heartbreak, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-27
Updated: 2014-11-27
Packaged: 2018-02-27 04:42:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2679527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hecalledherlittlewolf/pseuds/hecalledherlittlewolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My personal take on the first major romance scene with Fenris as a female mage Hawke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Night He Left

**Author's Note:**

> *Credit given where credit is due.

"Fenris?"

He stands and walks toward me, leaving only inches between us. "I have been thinking of you," he says on heavy breath. "In fact, I've been able to think of little else."

Fenris places his palm gently upon my cheek. "Command me to go, and I shall."

"No," I say softly. "Don't leave. Please."

To keep him from backing down, I pull him closer and let my fingers get lost in his hair, while my lips gently meet his. He returns the kiss slowly at first, but when he seems to realize that I am not pulling away, Fenris deepens the kiss and wraps his arms around me. It takes no time at all for the proximity between us to vanish.

Though my eyes are closed, I still see the markings begin to glow. I falter for just a moment, and Fenris breaks the kiss to pull away. "This is wrong-" he begins to say. Before he can turn away from me, however, I grab his elbow. Oops.

Fenris grabs my shoulders and pushes me back against the wall. As soon as I let out a grunt from the impact, Fenris's markings begin to fade and he is looking me straight in the eyes. "Oh. I-I apologize."

He begins to retreat once more, but this time I am ready. I pull him back into my embrace and once again our lips meet. Without hesitation, Fenris returns the kiss deeply and urgently. I turn him and push him against the wall in return, and I feel him smiling against my mouth. A chuckle rumbles and fades deep within his chest, and I smile as well. I am taken by surprise when Fenris lowers his arm behind my knees and begins carrying me toward the main hall. Much to my relief, everyone has gone to bed. He makes his way up the stairs to my bedroom and onto the bed.

Immediatly, he begins undoing the ties of my robe. As he does this, I kick off my boots and wrap my legs around his waist, lowering him on top of me as he continues to fight with my robe. It is almost comical. When he finally manages to toss it away, his kisses trail down my neck, then my shoulder, then my chest. I let out a gasp.

This time, instead of stopping to admit we are making a mistake, we continue on through the night. And for the first time since meeting him, I do believe Fenris is finally happy.

　

I awake to an empty bed. Well, empty except for my naked self, a blanket tossed across my body. It is only when my gaze drifts to the stone fireplace do I see Fenris, and my heart sinks. He is leaning against it, fully armored once more, a look of deep sorrow painting his face. I sigh, and he looks at me.

"Was it that bad?" I ask, propping myself up on my elbows. It is a minor victory when the blanket falls and exposes part of my chest, causing Fenris's gaze to drift for a moment.

"No, it's not that. It-" Fenris shakes his head, fighting with himself. "It was fine."

I gaze downward. Not the answer I was looking for. Fenris quickly says, "No! That is insufficient. It was better than anything I could have dreamed."

With that said, I hold the blanket to my chest and clumsily reach for my robe, which is lying on the floor by the bed. Wrapping myself tightly in it, I sit back on the bed with my arms crossed across my chest.

"Alright, then what is the problem?" I shake my head. "Your markings. They hurt, don't they?"

"It's not that. I began to remember... my life before, just flashes." He grunts, then sighs. "For just a moment, I could recall all of it."

"Don't you _want_ to remember?" I ask.

Fenris shakes his head. "You do not understand how upsetting this is. I have never remembered anything of my life before, and to have it back all at once just to _lose_ it. I can't... I can't."

"So you're ending it?" I say, my mood darkening. I bury my face in my hands.

Fenris attempts to take a step closer, but thinks better of it and remains where he is. "I'm sorry. I feel like such a fool."

I stand, desperately wanting him to stay. I need him, more than I should. This pain, this yearning... Is this what love is?

"But I care for you, Fenris. I need you here, with me."

Fenris shakes his head, then turns to walk away. "All I wanted was to be happy, just for a little while. Forgive me."

And with that, he is gone. Deep inside, I feel my heart shatter. Against my better judgement, I allow a tear to escape. Followed by another, and another, until I realize I have begun to cry full on. It's a strange thing, feeling so helpless when everyone I know depends on me for something. Well, almost everyone. I have not cried much in my lifetime, but it usually takes something extremely troubling to bring on such a reaction.

I suppose this _is_ what love is. And it hurts. A lot.


End file.
